Adam Conover Speaks to Your Concerns

Dear Adam,

I laugh a lot during sex. I find it funny, but everyone else seems to take it so seriously. I don’t get it. Isn’t sex funny?

Amber Q.
Sonoma, CA

Adam responds:

Sex is better when it’s funny. So much of the time we’re stuck in our heads, arguing with our own internal monologues—Am I doing this right? Was that sexy or do they think I’m an idiot? Should I tell them I’d like it if they pinched me and called me a dirty milkman or would that make them jump through a closed window?—instead of being present and here with the person we’re fucking. A joke is a wonderful way to cut the tension, bring you both back to reality, and, most important, share an honest and genuine moment of pure communication with your grind-partner.

Here are some ideas for some sex jokes you can use:

• “I learned that trick from [Dame Maggie Smith/Rip Torn/other elderly character actor].”
• “My mother said that to me just yesterday!”
• And the ever-popular surprise zerbert.

My partner and I are so committed to sex jokes that sometimes we end up laughing so hard we completely forget to finish having sex. And you know what? It’s just as satisfying, with only half to two-thirds the mess.

Dear Adam,

I love your show. It’s fun and informative and feels like a hot shower at the end of a long day. Only it’s better, because it’s a hot moment of truth after a long life of bullshit narratives being thrust upon us. I work in the media. I used to draw, and now I work in animation, mostly advertising and documentaries. My question is this: how do you make the jump from working gig to gig to gig to gig and barely making ends meet, to finding the time to develop meaningful work? How wayward was your path toward your true north? Were there a lot of pit stops? 

I want to join you in the fight against bullshit but, sadly, drawing another ad for a mattress company pays better, and I’m afraid I’ll spend my whole life churning out the narratives I’m against if I don’t start using my powers for good. How did you manage?

David P.
Brooklyn, NY

Adam responds:

I am only a part-time advice columnist, so let me reply honestly: I’m not sure how to answer this question.

I could tell you what I did. During my ten years of making ends meet by doing freelance web design, video editing, and graphic design work, I spent my nights and weekends doing as much comedy...